Things my parents taught me: “Life’s not fair” and “Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it”

Sarah here…finally! Jordan and I can’t believe how fast time is flying by. And since Jord usually preps our blog entries at night when I am doing lesson planning, I haven’t written a blog in ages! I really liked his idea of blog entries about things our parents have taught us/values they’ve instilled in us because we definitely reflect on those things on a daily basis! It’s very humbling to think of all of the sacrifices our parents made for us and all of the opportunities they provided us – we love you and can’t thank you enough, and we owe this experience to you!

My first entry for this topic is: “Life’s not fair…Sometimes you have to grin and bear it”. These lessons were given to me by both of my parents. When I was little, I was always saying “But Dad, that’s not FAIR!”, and his response would always be “Sarah, life’s not fair”. In saying that, my Dad was not only trying to get me to realize that life is indeed not always fair, but that we have to accept it and deal with it and make the most of the situation. This truth has shown itself to me in so many ways here. First, and the most petty, was when we first got our site placements, and saw all the people that were headed to sites by or near the beach, and we found out we were headed to a site just south of Burkina Faso! That’s not fair! But then we got to our site, and realized that it fit us perfectly, and was probably the closest site for us to our best friend Kelsey when she came to Ghana in December for her job . We can always go to the beach for vacation J. We were also frustrated about the fact that we are very far from either of the PC sub-offices that volunteers can visit anytime to use the computer, have some R&R, cook in ovens and sleep with fans J. That’s not fair! But again, we are blessed to be close to two other volunteers that were placed to the bigger cities to the north and south of us that have those same amenities. I also reflect on the fact that “Life’s not fair” for many people here. Why was I born into a life of opportunity and many people here were born into a life of hardship? Why do many kids have to suffer in our village from sickness because of poor sanitation and play with toys made out of discarded tomato tins when so many kids back home have so many toys they don’t know what to do with them? I don’t have answers to these questions, but I just remember my Dad saying “Life’s not fair” and realizing that the only thing I can control about “Life” in general is the attitude I have about the situations I encounter. Thanks Dad!

My mom, through action and not necessarily through word, was always demonstrating to me the lesson “Sometimes you just have to grin and bear it”. Life can be tough sometimes, in small ways and big ways, sometimes to get through a situation you just have to grin and bear it! Put on a happy face, get through it, and make the most of it! If there’s a battle you’re not going to win, sometimes you just have to grin and bear it. Sheesh, this lesson has been so valuable to me here. I get frustrated with many things at school on a daily basis, and if I tried to constantly change all of these things, I would go CRAZY and would also be unsuccessful in changing most things, since they are larger systemic changes that are part of a bigger challenge than what I was brought here to the school for. So I grin and bear it, try to keep a positive attitude and push through it. There are certain battles I will choose to try to enter here, but only if I believe I can achieve a positive outcome without offending people while creating sustainable change. That narrows the scope of the battles I can choose! This lesson comes in handy for even the small things that can get to me during the day here, like when there’s a lot of manual work to do at night (water the garden, fetch water, etc) and I’m tired and just want to lay down. Grin and bear it and finish off the work because it’s just what you have to do. And when I get down or frustrated I think of my mom keepin’ on keepin’ on and I try to do the same! J

These lessons that were passed on to me through word and action keep me moving through the day with a positive attitude and a smile on my face. Because even though life’s not fair and sometimes I have to grin and bear it, life here is still sweet, and we are loving each and every one of our experiences. Thanks Mom and Dad!! Love you!